Monday, April 28, 2008

{Drama}

So things have been pretty topsy turvey at the Stewart household. I would have to say that the last week has not been good. On Sunday I discovered that my favorite jeans and my favorite shirt (both fairly new) had holes in it. Grrrr. I hate it when my clothes get ruined. I don't have a ton to begin with and those particular items made me feel so skinny. Boo! OK, maybe doesn't sound so bad, but when you hear about the rest of my week you will hopefully feel my pain.
So, earlier in the week we found out that, yet again, not pregnant. This is kind of silly way to break it on my blog, but yes Scott and I are trying to get pregnant--for like, 2.5 years. That is worthy of a blog post by itself, and I had written a really long one, venting out my frustration (I was crying when I typed it, hence it might be a little too personal to post anyway) when I received some other news.
Drumroll please...so, on Friday my boss informed me that they are closing down the store. Yep, Silver Pelican is closing their doors. I couldn't have been more shocked. I was totally not expecting that. It completely floored me.
*Don't freak out Shannon, I'm not sure what they are doing with old customers, but I am sure they will have a plan. I'll keep you posted.*
This weekend has been stressful to say the least. I have been trying to decide what to do and what my options are. In a way I feel like I have given so much Silver Pelican, but I have also been feeling the desire to grow as an artist and not being sure if it was going to happen there. I have been so confused on my life. I want to be a mom so bad, but it just isn't happening and I keep feeling like I was putting my life on hold while I waited for it. I haven't known what to do or what I wanted anymore. The last few months Scott and I have done a lot of thinking and praying, but I still have felt so lost.
This new news has made me realize that I don't want to go work for another portrait company (besides the only options are Kiddie Candids or Sears), I want to start my own business. So yay! there is some good news, hopefully, amongst all the bad news. I am starting my own business! It is happening so much quicker than I would have ever have anticipated and I am sooooo stressed out--we don't have any extra money to start a company. Hopefully it will work out...No, scratch that, I know it will work out. It is exciting news, not sad news. I think I will have to get a part-time job in addition to that. We do have a mortgage to pay after all. OK, I need to not freak out right now. I will be able to pay the mortgage, this will all work out.
Anyway, enough of that. The secondary reason I am posting all of this is to ask for your help. I need to get a business name now so I can start developing a website, blog, etc. I don't want to use my name since there are already two Lindsey photography companies in Salt Lake already.
In my next post I am going to post some of the ideas I have had brainstorming with family. I would love any additional suggestions. I know I shouldn't over-analyze this, but I am having a hard time coming up with one. I love the look of Anthropologie and J.Crew combined. Something clean, fresh, classic and a smidge boutiquey. I don't want it to seem too contrived, but I want it to be fun also. Also, If anyone knows any great, flexible part time jobs, I am looking!
Anyway, thanks for listening to my crazy, random, rambling thoughts. I feel like my brain is all over the place right now. Hopefully (have I used that word too much?) it will all work out and when our life unfolds a little more Scott and I will understand this time a little better. Right now we are just trying our best to figure it out, stay positive and roll with what comes. Sorry if this all seems a little light hearted. I really am very upset, but I am starting to go into solve-problem-mode and that helps keep me focused on the issues I need to deal with.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ohmygod. I will call you.

rYLeE & KaTiE said...

Lindsey- I'm sorry about trying to get pregnant. My parents tried for almost 10 years before they began the adoption process, so in a way, I feel your pain. It always seems like when it rains it pours. You are SO talented and will be fine as far as photography goes. I will recommend you to all my friends. I wish you would have shot my wedding. (Silly husbands.) I will try to think of some names and ask Rylee because is surprisingly good at stuff like that. I know you don't know me that well, but e-mail me if you need someone to talk to. Really.

caitlin said...

Sweet Lindsey,

First let me say, you are seriously one of my favorite photographers. (and you can take that as a major compliment considering where I work!) I was actually going to ask you why you didn't do what Lindsey Hale does. You in NO way need to worry about the photography stuff. (and I will hype you up here at the lab) I got your back! :)

Secondly, life is funny how it works out. But the one thing I keep realizing is that it's always worth it to go through hard times. And when you look back you feel incredibly strong.

I will try to rack my brain with ideas for you, and seriously girl let me know if you need anything. (don't hesitate)

caitlin said...

What about something like bumblebee photo (just thinking out loud here!) :) I am just trying to think about words I like...(don't think I am a freak!)

britta said...

WHAT THE %$#& ?!?!? Silver Pelican is closing?? I am floored and speechless and frightened!! Holy Cow!! WHAT THE . .! is all I can think right now.

BreeAnn said...

Lindsey- I agree with everyone else that if you start your own business,I would for sure be a customer! Hands down. You are very artistically gifted. I am going to write you an e-mail about some other stuff!
BreeAnn

Shan @ Design Gal said...

Oh Lindsey I'm so sorry. I know exactly how you feel when life throws a curve ball! I can totally see you having your own photo business! I'll keep you in my thoughs and prayers!

ike and em said...

All I can say is wow. I had no idea. Wow. Well, it sounds like there is a wonderful opportunity for you to showcase your talent your way. That is really great. I really like the names you've come up with. I know without a doubt that you will be successful. I can't wait to see what you do. --emily